CBC Cabinet Titbits

Things that we now know following the CBC Cabinet meeting this evening…

The usual *proper* CBC Cabinet meeting took place ahead of the pantomime charade. All the done deals for the WEIRD LibLab Cabinet were dealt with behind closed doors ahead of the main meeting. Democracy? Pah.

LibDem Cllr Anne Turrell was on holiday; Andy Hamilton WAN’T in the building [sad face.]

Tory Leader Cllr Willetts was the lone Conservative Ranger tonight. We thought it slightly odd that none of his party pals came out to support him.

Cllr Willetts did come well prepared though. THREE speeches on THREE Cabinet items.

We are slightly troubled that the politicos get longer to speak than the Have Your Say residents (although NO ONE in the entire borough stepped forward this evening.)

It wasn’t quite back of a fag packet stuff, but Cllr Willetts does like his spider diagrams when it comes to speech writing. We’re not entirely sure what the central point was in the bubble in the middle. An empty vacuum of ideas?

The main line of attack from Cllr Willetts on the Strategic Plan is that the WEIRD LibLab Cabinet was taking all the credit from the Tory led Essex County Council. You don’t say.

LIVE theatre then took place. Cllr Willetts took a wander to the Grand Jury Room window, looked outside and yep – there’s no High Street Market. LibDem Cllr Nick Barlow had to point out that there wouldn’t be – it was a Wednesday evening.

We remain slightly fearful (and a little in awe) of the shark eyes belonging to Council Leader Cllr Martin Hunt. You looking at me?

There is no Tory alternative to the Strategic Plan…

The WEIRD LibLab Cabinet couldn’t wait to pull apart Cllr Willetts’ argument. LibDem Cllr Paul Smith did the figures, Comrade Cllr Tim Young did the ideology, Cllr Hunt just gave an empty STARE.

Strategic Plan passed, time for the Environmental Sustainability Strategy. Buzzword heavy, lacking slightly in detail. The Grand Jury Room does have a TV screen that would put the Odeon to shame though.

The Sustainability game of bingo covered everything from heritage to bloody climate change. Not a single mention of Jumbo though.


Revelation of the evening: Cllr Hunt has run across the roof of firstsite. It may *or may not* have been a naked run. Probably not…

The General Fund Revenue Budget, Capital Programme and Medium Term Financial Forecast was… fun. We think?

Cllr Willetts managed to collectively send the Cabinet to sleep with his second speech. iPads were prodded; papers were aimlessly flicked through. Those sitting around the top table with any hair left did a bit of grooming.

Cllr Willetts managed to ‘better’ his previous effort on ‘benefit tourism’ [sic] from the last Cabinet meeting. The Tory Leader congratulated Cabinet on making 280 CBC staff redundant. There was no sense of irony. NO FUCKING SENSE of irony.

Cllr Smith was keen to press home that frontline jobs are being protected. There’s not much left of the back office to be honest…

The Tory vision for CBC is that of a commissioning service claimed Cllr Hunt. The WEIRD LibLab Cabinet may be a forced marriage, but it is certainly better than buying a dodgy relationship over the modern interweb.

We played Candy Crush during the Housing Revenue Account Estimates 2015/16. Apologies.

Cllr Young forgot for one moment that he was in Sunny Colch and not Clacton, as he banged on about housing being a key issue at the General Election.

The Fundamental Service Review of Corporate and Financial Management passed us by.

The Half yearly Performance Report including progress on Strategic Plan awoke us slightly as resident Nick Chilvers emerged from the floor to give a speech. He claimed that most councils are “full of basket cases.” But not CBC. Nope.

Cllr Willetts attempted a hat-trick of own goals. He just about managed it by stating that the Council had failed on all of it’s own objectives. Sadly for Cllr Willetts it was only half-time. It had to be politely pointed out to him that this is the SIX month review…

All of the above will be rubber-stamped by the party whips when Full Council is assembled on 18 February.

Cue LibDem claims of ‘no whips.’


One thought on “CBC Cabinet Titbits

  • 28th Jan 2015 at 11:00 pm

    There are no whips ……. shark stare!

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